This is the first in what we hope to be a series of monthly guest posts from other Boston Bruins, NHL and hockey bloggers. Our inaugural post goes to Cameron Frye, Boston-based female blogger who has also made guest appearance on DeadSpin and HubHockey.com. She rocks and the DOY Staff are big fans of hers. If you’d like to guest blog on Days of Y’Orr, email email@example.com.
I haven’t done much writing since the Bruins lost to the Flyers *cringe* last season, but I’ve had a lot of time to think about what happened on the ice and honestly, it wasn’t that bad. Ok, yes it was — but it worked out in the favor of the Bruins and that’s a good thing. So, as mentioned before, I had a lot of time to think about the collapse of epic proportion and I’d like to give you my top three reasons why the Bruins collapse worked out in their favor.
1. Tyler Seguin. Ok, so the kid doesn’t have the personality of Shawn Thornton (way to equate Thorny as the team fat girl, Cam. Ugh), but he can play. Hell, there’s been a couple of times where Tyler has made Micheal Ryder look good and that’s damn near impossible to do.
Around the time of the draft, I decided to put my then Jello like brain to use and do some research on the kids in the draft. I know everyone and their mothers wanted Taylor Hall — but something about him just didn’t seem right. Sure, he went balls the wall and we all saw him play with a bloody face — but there wasn’t much else.
I know Anna Wintour (H.B.I.C. of Vogue – don’t worry, you’re not going to catch the gay for knowing who Ms.Anna is) would probably disown me for making the following statement, but I’ll always take substance over style anytime in hockey and I wanted nothing to do with Mongo Lemieux. I know it’s barely two months into the season – but so far Tyler has worked out in the Bruins favor. Now if only his commercial readings were better and less robotic. They all can’t be Shawn Thornton. *sigh*
2. Philly’s Failure. Anyone who knows me, knows I loathe that city. I have a problem with any city that builds statues to celebrate fake sports icons. Don’t get me wrong, Rocky Balboa was great and who didn’t love it when he beat the crap out of the Russian hopped up on ‘roids? But he’s not real! Make one of Mike Schmidt and have it cry on the hour or construct a giant bobble head of Eric Lindros.
Awww… that was mean. No, not really. If I said make his head out of piñata and pass out sticks with the Inquirer on Sunday — that would be mean.
What were we talking about? Oh yeah, Philly’s failure.
How about this, would you have rather the Bruins gone on to the Stanley Cup finals and just not even shown up against the Hawks? Of course not! That’s like if you got to take out the slutty girl in high school on a date and you made sure the night was perfect for her to put out – only to find out the hosebag found Jesus and would not be taking to time to have miserable high school sex with you and making you into a man. Boo.
3. Dennis Wideman. I’ll admit it — I liked Wideman. I still do. As an underachiever, I felt a bit of a kinship with the lad. I won’t lie, homeboy did a few million things that would make want to pound someone’s skull into sidewalk (but never mine. That would hurt and I would bruise and facial bruising is never in fashion. Although, I do look good in purple). He just wasn’t a good fit and it was made abundantly clear last season. While some people can thrive off the passion and/or hate of the fans, others crumble like cookies and cry themselves to sleep at night. I’m looking at you, Renteria.
So, the Bruins did what was best for both parties involved and shipped his ass to Florida and it’s worked out. I mean, Nathan Horton hasn’t looked too shabby since he got here. Plus the change of scenery has agreed with Wideman. When I was in Florida a few weeks ago, I watched the Panthers to see how the old chap was doing and I figured it would be good for a cheap laugh. But dare I say it, Wideman was good. Did he make some bonehead moves – of course (somethings never change). But I was actually impressed with his play. Maybe the slow, Southern way of life is agreeing with the trouser snake? A win-win for both parties involved. Just remember, Bruins fans — Blake Wheeler is an excellent replacement for The Whipping Post Wideman.
So yeah, sure — last year’s loss sucked donkey balls on a humid day. But it worked out in the favor of the fans and who knows what other good things are coming our way. But I swear to God, if the Bruins go all fail whale again on me this season I’m going to….. do nothing and just wait until next year.
Hey, it worked out for the Sox, right?