subbanmauled

Montreal Full of Pansies. Bruins Still Lose.

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This one hurt. Every time the Bruins lose to the Habs it hurts. Even though it happens a lot. But still. Bruins didn’t really show up to this game. The Canadiens pitiful powerplay scored two goals on Boston’s top ranked PK. Montreal players dove so much it made the Capitals look good by comparison.

MaximLapierreDives

Maybe the Bruins were just mentally and physically drained after that Pittsburgh game.

No excuses though. A loss is a loss. Gross. 

After the jump… Montreal is full of pansies, refs are blind and play so ugly your ex looks great by comparison…

1st
 

What We Liked:

- One of the best things about the Bruins playing a team from Canada Eh is getting to hear Rene Rancourt sing twice. There is not a better anthem singer in the NHL. 

- Bruins fans started a “Carey’s a girl’s name!” chants less than 30 seconds in. Apparently girls are good goalies against the Bruins.

-  Caron was a beast early. He was building a house in Carey Price’s crease. Couldn’t get the puck in the net though. Houses are big I guess.

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- In true Canadien fashion, Roman Hamrlik pushed Mark Stuart from behind after a whistle. As his wife looked on in disgust at what she had married, Stuart showed Hamrlik and his wife what a real man is and caved Hamrlik in. Hamrlik realized at this point who he was messing with and laid on the ice like he had been shot. Eventually the refs came to save him.

hamrlikhiding
- Marchand is a PK beast. Seems like every time he’s out there he gets a great shorthanded chance. Killer.

- Lucic and Bergeron were beasts along the boards to set up Chara’s sweet goal.

What We Didn’t Like:

- P.K. Subban is a little punk. He’s acts cocky like he’s actually accomplished something at the NHL level. You haven’t done shit yet buddy. Every time someone came near him he threw a cheap shot and then skated away and acted like a tough guy. He’s just as classy as his Montreal fans.

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- Funny how Spacek takes cheap shots on guys like Marchand but not Thornton, Chara or Lucic. Real tough guy hiding behind the refs after you push lil Marchand. You punch babies too?

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- Those people at games that yell “Hey Time Keeper, how much time left?!?” When the clock reaches a minute left in the period. Then of course the time keeper says “one minute remaining in the period.” You’re not funny. Or original. That joke wasn’t funny when we first heard it 30 years ago and it ain’t funny now. You’re not clever, you’re dumb. Knock it off.

Score: 1-1 after the first.

2nd

What We Liked:

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- Love when Rask makes a glove save, and an opposing player still swipes at it… and Rask just holds his glove up for a few extra seconds just to say “I got it bitch.”

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- Shawn Thornton is so dangerous the refs had to constantly keep him in the penalty box all period just so he wouldn’t destroy people and embarrass Carey Price.

What We Didn’t Like:

- Carey Price suddenly being good. What the hell.

- Pissed Subban wasn’t mauled by a bear. He’s definitely living up to the Montreal legacy of being a wussy little punk. 

- Bruins would totally lose at Mortal Kombat. They just can’t finish around the net tonight.

- Montreal’s idiot fans sing Ole Ole Ole so much that their players actually think they’re playing soccer now. Canadiens tried to get away with kicking a puck into the net.

- Helen Keller was apparently the head referee tonight. Habs take cheap shots, no call. Bruins respond to said cheap shots, all of a sudden the whistles come out.

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3rd

What We Liked:

- Rask’s attitude. He’s had such bad luck this season that we thought this loss might go something like this:

raskgodzilla
But instead… it was something like this…..

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He knows his wins will come. What a guy. Go Rask.

What We Didn’t Like:

- Boston’s top ranked PK getting dominated by that fool Gionta. You hear that Mike Giardi? Gionta smells.

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About Jon

Jon loves Batman, The Joker, the Bruins and hates you. Especially you. He has a man crush on David Backes and hopes to someday be Mrs. Jon Boychuk.

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