2. GameDay Brew Bolts at Bruins

banner

Welcome everyone to GameDay Brew, something I used to run over at my blog before I came to the wonderful land of Days of Y’Orr. I thought about bringing it back last season, but since it was already halfway through the season, I decided to wait until this year and guess what…I missed the opening day game! What can I say, DOY was busy yesterday and I couldn’t get it done. I suck, I know. So lets pretend that I did one for Thursday and lets call this one #2 to coincide with the gameday number.

So what to drink after you’ve raised a championship banner but are winless on the season?

I guess that’s the ultimate question right? There’s a multitude of things to drink, especially in the fall season. You have pumpkin everything. Beer. Coffee. I’m surprised they don’t make a fucking pumpkin milk because from the end of September to February everything is pumpkin. Look, I enjoy the taste of pumpkin. Pumpkin muffins, pumpkin cookies, pumpkin doughnuts, pumpkin beer, pumpkin coffee, pumpkin pie, pumpkin bread, etc. It’s all very delicious, but come on, no need to put pumpkin in or on everything! What if someone has a pumpkin allergy (like my good friend does).

Anyways…to the drinks! Now, I call this GameDay Brew, but it won’t always be beer. Most of it will be because I love beer, but for those out there who don’t like beer, I’ll have some alcoholic mixed drinks (or shots) thrown into the mix.

After the jump, lets drink!

It’s Saturday night and you’re probably looking for something to wet your whistle. You could be one of those unimaginative douchebags and order a Bud Light or be an idiot and order a Coors Light because you can’t tell when your beer is COLD or SUPER COLD!!

Quick rant here: Coors Light not only sucks, but it tastes like cold ram’s piss. If you want something better than Coors Light, just drink some water, piss into a pile of dirt and put that into a can. Worse than the beer itself? The fucking commercials. OH LOOK AT ME, I KNOW WHEN MY BEER IS COLD BECAUSE MY CAN TELLS ME! What are you, a fucking dunce?

dunce cap
You need a can of beer to tell you when it’s cold? I have an easier trick for you…put your hand on the can. If the can is warm, guess what genius, your beer is warm too. If the can is cold…you guessed it sailor! Your beer is cold! Amazing isn’t it? How could you now tell that without your beer can reading ‘Cold’ and ‘Super Cold’? Also, what the difference between cold and super cold? It’s beer. Once it’s cold, it’s cold. You’re not camping in bumfuck Maine where you need to know if it will be 0 degrees or -30 degrees out for your sleeping bag and clothes. Also, if I ever hear someone say “Wow, my beer is SUPER COLD!”, I’m going to sit outside of the bar in my car and run you down. You don’t deserve to live at that point because you sound like a pretentious douchebag.

Wow. I’m sorry. Where was I again?

OH YES!

So it’s Saturday night and you’re looking to wet your whistle. Well bitches, let’s started this 2011-2012 campaign off in the right direction. I present to you the Harpoon Stormtrooper!

Harpoon
The Harpoon Stormtrooper is a mix of two Harpoon beers: The Harpoon Leviathan IPA and the UFO White. I had this at the Harpoonfest two years ago and it knocked me on my fucking ass. Not only was it delicious, but I believe it’s somewhere around 9% alcohol. For those who don’t know their beer, something like Bud Light is 4.2% alcohol by volume. Hell, even Molson XXX is 7.3%. The stormtrooper is a fucking monster, so be careful when drinking it. If you’re not a regular boozebag like myself, you may want to sip it. If you try to be a hero, you’ll crawling down Causeway St. like a baby puking your guts up and crying for Mommy.

Come on man, we’ve all been there.

Until next time, enjoy the brew, crew.

drunk pez

Quantcast