Too little, too late. Bruins lose… again.

Stanley Cup Hangover talk is going to be at full strength now that the Bruins dropped to 1-3. Oy.

Fucking brutal.

None of this yesterday.
Boston bruins road warriors
The team was lifeless for 2 1/4 periods. It wasn’t until Wonder Boy Tyler Seguin ripped a lazer did the team finally woke up. Kid looked pissed after his goal. Average age of the teams best scorers this year is 21. Yay for veteran leadership.

In fact, everyone but Seguin, Marchand, Rask and Thomas have been like ghosts for most of the young season. Unreal. Someone needs to tell the boys that preseason is over. These games count.

Again, Shawn Thornton looked for some dance partners to help spark his team. And again no one on the opposing team obliged. Is it because they’re pussies? Maybe. But it’s also smart. Why let Boston reenergize themselves with a fight when they’re dogging it? That’s just smart play by opposing teams.

Also, how many times did you hear Doc say “Shot by Kaberle!”? Didn’t think that phrase could ever be muttered.

Bruins were also 0-5 on the PP. Sounds about right.

David Krejci was out with a “core processor” injury. Whatever that means. .

“We’re not that far off,” Thomas said. “The difference between us having the results we want and the way it happened tonight, for example, isn’t that far off.


We recap yet another piss-poor performance after the jump…

No one took the lead out of the Bruins skates so it became the Tim Thomas show early on.

That’s all you really need to know about the first period.

0-0 after one.

‘Canes strike first and fast, 42 seconds into the period. Joni Pitkanen looks like he’s being controlled by someone playing NHL12 so much that the Bruins PK unit is dazzled and let him skate from the top side boards to the face off dot without even farting in his general direction. Thomas is deep in his net. Banks in. Thomas was not happy that Staal was able to camp out in front of him like that. He may/may not have been in the way of Timmy moving to stop the shop. Regardless, bad PK.

Seriously. Pitkanen was stick handling by himself in the corner for eight seconds without anyone challenging him. Poor showing. And yes, “stick handling” is a euphanism.

1-0 after the first period. Bruins 0-3 on the PP in the second period.

Pretty sure a sizeable portion of Bruins fans changed channels after this goal.

Thomas was screened. Puck bounced off Seidenberg’s stick, too, which doesn’t help things. 2-0, ‘Canes.

Hurriances Bruins
It was at this point that Tyler Seguin decided that he needed to lift the team onto his slender 19-year-old back. He took a pass from Horton and turned on the jets, blew by everyone in Carolina and then just let an absoulte lazer beam shot go top shelf over Ward’s shoulder. Guy had no chance on stopping it.

Boston Bruins fans cheer
2-1, Carolina.

Adam McQuaid decides to dive head first into the boards again. Apparently doing it against the Flyers last season wasn’t enough. He’s woozy, gets up and then trys to hold Ference’s stick down. Yikes.

We can only imagine that he’s trying to see what it’s like to be a Montreal Canadien.

Jiri Tlusty made it 3-1 halfway through the period. Ference loses the puck and then all hell beaks loose. No one wearing black and gold wanted to touch the damn thing. Puck must’ve had the herpes. Fortunately for Carolina, Tlusty already has the herp and fires a shot passed a Thomas.

Bruins fans react:

3-1, Carolina.

Lucic decided to show up for a few shifts anyways. Or so some Getty images want us to think.

Nothing going Lucic’s way. Greg is pissed. We miss this Lucic.

Later on in the third, Pizz makes a huge find. He spots Margaret McPoyle behind the Bruins bench. 

Marget McPoyle Bruins fanSuck on that, Vancouver. McPoyle > Greenmen.

Brad the Lad Marchand decides to help his buddy Seguin out.

Beautiful pass. Nice shot. Does this count as a PP goal?

3-2, Carolina.

Bruins pull Thomas.

Bergeron called for a tripping penalty with 2 seconds left.


‘Canes win 3-2.


About Justin

Co-Founder for multi-award winning @DaysofYOrr. I mix nerd fandom & sports. For my historical adventure novels visit