Where’s the D-eef? Bruins Lose.

Just one of those games. Bruins never quite seemed in it mentally. The defense abandoned Rask from the start and it was all down hill from there. Eventually Buffalo started converting all the chances they were given.

It was a home game and Rask was in net so maybe we should’ve seen this coming. But the Bruins are coming off big wins against top teams in the Eastern Conference and a home and home against Carolina. They crapped themselves tonight and were still in it most of the game. We’ll see how they respond Saturday against a good Colorado team.

After the jump…. Bruins hate playing defense and Buffalo fans are dumb. Really, really dumb……..

– Because traffic sucks and people don’t know how to drive we got to TD Garden ten minutes late. Bruins on the powerplay though. Sweet.

– Horton tries to pass to Ryder cross crease when he should have shot and Myers gets a stick on it. WTF Horton.

– Not a good showing on the powerplay. We blame ourselves for being late. The Bruins were upset.

– Tim Connolly gets kicked out of the faceoff dot. Bruins win and Seidenberg gets the puck and fires a shot. Boom. Miller must think this is the Olympics because that went five hole. 1-0 Bruins. Score! Seidenberg is bigger in Germany than David Hasselhoff.

–  Rask is fantastic. He didn’t do anything yet (that we’ve seen) but just stating the obvious.

– Krejci gets a juicy rebound in from of Cryan Miller but the puck gets deflected over the net.

– Kaleta tries to take a run at Seidenberg and gets his pansy ass knocked to the ice. Hahahahahahahahahaha.

– Rask needs some help. Bruins D is laaaaaaaaaaaaazy so far.

– Ryder returns the earlier favor from Horton and makes a bad pass that is intercepted.

– Got distracted for a few minutes making Phil Kessel jokes for no reason. Sorry. It happens.

– Seidenberg cleary gets his stick held but no call. Thats what she said. Booooooo.

– Looks like Seguin might have a breakaway but Looch gets called for a penalty. Refs probably felt bad for Lindy Ruff and gave his team a call so he’d come back out to the bench.

– Marchand just abusing some dude on the penalty kill. Marchand’s awesomeness is blocking the name and number. Not like we care anyway.

– Some midget named Gerbe tries to mess with Chara and gets schooled. You suck Buffalo.

– Penalty killed. No problem.

– Kaleta still taking runs at people instead of, you know, actually playing the puck. What a waste of sperm he was.

What an idiot. Just proving Sabres fans can’t read.

– Do you think Kaleta’s mom and dad are talking and his mom says “I wish we used a condom that night?”

– Periods ends as Kaleta starts his. 1-0 Bruins.

– Patrick Kaleta sucks.

– Seidenberg trying out for the German soccer team and kicks the puck out of mid air.

– McCormick hits the post and the puck bounces out in front. Not a single Bruin covers him. He gets his own rebound. Goal. 1-1. Bruins have been pretty poor on defense so far. Quite frankly we’re surprised this didn’t happen sooner.

– While the Bruins ice crew is fixing some broken glass, we’d like to take a moment to remind you that Buffalo sucks camel dongs.

– Sabres take one of the most obvious tripping penalties we’ve ever seen. Lindy Ruff proceeded to explode into a rage on the bench because the refs are blind!

– Boychuk with a nice keep in but it is all for naught. Puck cleared, powerplay over. Lindy Ruff wipes his vagina.

– Thornton goes in off a turnover but can’t get anything going. 

– Thornton wants revenge. Thornton to Wheeler to Campbell GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL! 2-1 Bruins. Go fuck yourself Buffalo.

– “Tic, Tac, Goal!”~ Jack Edwards

– Miller must think its the Olympics because.. oh sorry we already made that joke.

– Buffalo tries to score but Rask is all like I’m super cool and I’m gonna make a glove save, whatevs.

– Rask makes another save as Kaleta stares down at him. Must be looking at what a real hockey player looks like and thinking about hanging himself. Be like Nike Kaleta and just do it.

– Sabres coming alive a bit. Boychuk pushes that bitch Kaleta. Awesome. Sabres have Bruins on their heels a little bit. Not awesome.

– Poor Horton. He just can’t do anything right lately. You’ll get there buddy. Chin up!

– Ference throws a shot towards the net that almost ricochets in. Someone in there Wheeler gets called for interference on Miller. Guess Miller cries enough that refs don’t even let you breathe on him anymore.

– Bruins come right down on the PK and almost embarrass Miller. Sooooooooooo close. He started crying and wrote in his journal about it.

– Bruins break out on a 3 on 2. On the PK. Chara shoots right into Miller’s chest. Maybe he was trying to give Miller a heart attack.

– Booooooooooo. Gerbe all alone in the circle. Powerplay goal by Gerbe. Stupid midget. 2-2. Bruins love leaving people all alone like that lately. Terrible habit.

– Kampfer tries to assassinate Weber with a shot. Weber goes down in a heap and the Sabres trainer rushes onto the ice. Weber really favoring his leg.

– Kampfer with one hell of a defensive stop as play resumes. What a beast.

– Savard and Horton head down on a 2 on 1 after a nice pass from Kampfer but Savard misses just wide.

– Bruins have apparently thrown team defense out the window in front of Rask tonight. This could get ugly.

– Kaleta gets hit with a shot and goes down. One of the few players in the league we won’t clap for when he gets back up. Kharma bitch.

– Best part of that was that Boychuk hit him! Kaleta sucks!

– The Bruins strategy of letting the Sabres stroll into the zone and fire unopposed at Rask is not a good strategy. At all.

– Bruins get their first shot in what feels like forever. Winding down towards the end of the period. 

– Not a whole lot of bounce in the Bruins step towards the end of the period. Tigger would be disappointed.

– Horton waits just a second too long to pull the trigger with Miller down in the net and the Sabres get a stick on it.

– Period ends 2-2.

– What a way to start the period. Kampfer gets a puck by Miller but the Sabres save it at the goal line. Apparently the Bruins were unhappy with how the second period ended.

– Bruins getting pressure all over the place the first two minutes. Keep it up boys!

– Thornton, unlike Kaleta, is tough. Gets hit in the face and doesn’t even think about leaving the ice.

– Ference with a long bomb but Miller gets the pad on it. B’s making him work.

– Krejci breaks up the Bruins pressure by blindly passing to Buffalo. Those blind passes have a 0.000002% success rate.

– Horton’s first instinct is pass when it should be shoot.

– Bruins turnover the puck and Buffalo heads the other way. Vanek shoots and scores. F you. 3-2 Sabres.

– Dammit Horton, just shoot. Do it buddy. Do it. Horton with the huge assist on Vanek’s goal.

– Thornton chirps Montador and Montador knows he’ll just catch a beating so he skates away.

– Organ player off his/her game tonight. Like the Bruins defense.

– Teams going up and down the ice without really exchanging scoring chances. Some shit almost goes down after a whistle and Chara gets a stern talking to from the refs. Probably telling him to take it easy on Buffalo. Buffalo fans around the country immediately screamed for a suspension.

– Bruins seem like they’re feeling out the Sabres, waiting for them to make the first move. Not sure they’re aware it is the third period.

– Ryder and Savard get schooled back to back and kiss the ice. Poor form boys.

– Another uncontested shot at Rask by the Sabres, this time by Hecht. Defense Bruins. Defense.

– Marchand and Recchi start throwing the body around and try to bang some rebounds past Miller. See Bruins? Go to the front of the net! Follow Recchi and Marchand’s lead!

– Ryder skates in and shoots on Miller but no other Bruins around. Not sure if they’re trying to win.

– Stuart gets testy and knocks Weber on his ass. Don’t F with Mark Stuart.  He’s one bad mama jama!

– Vanek skates in again but Rask makes the save. Bruins getting lucky tonight. If the Sabres were good they’d convert on all these easy chances.

– Horton passes to Savard cross crease but Sekera takes down Savard. Boo.

– Oh no. Kampfer slips and Buffalo collects the puck. Sabres skate down the other way and no one covers Pominville. Easy goal. 4-2 Sabres. Bruins not even close to on their game tonight.

– B’s almost score but they look done. Bad game. It happens. Whatever. Buffalo still sucks. And we’re still not sorry.

– B’s go on the powerplay but Miller makes a demoralizing save. Game over. Oh well. Shit happens.

– Bruins didn’t show up for Rask again. Not good.

– Colorado Saturday. Hopefully puts give a better effort.

About Trashboy Jon

Jon loves Batman, The Joker, the Bruins and hates you. Especially you. He has a man crush on David Backes and hopes to someday be Mrs. Jon Boychuk.