Does a Bear poop on the ice?! BRUINS LOSE.



Well… that was almost as painful as a Kathy Griffin comedy special. The Bruins went out and took a giant poop on the ice. Luckily for our dear B’s no one in Tampa noticed because they just assumed the elderly man next to them in the stands crapped their pants.

It was almost as brutal as the beating Marchand beat on Sedin’s face. It was almost as ugly as Justin.


It was…. well you get the picture. We hope they all feel ashamed of themselves. We’re still not worried though. They’ll get their confidence back. They’re over thinking everything.

The defense was bad, the offense missed a ton of chances and Thomas was human. Julien probably has everyone on the team tied up in a closet and whips them every hour for displeasing him.

Whatever though. We’re still not concerned. For some reason Buffalo and Montreal fans are chirping us for the Bruins “slump.” Seems like you have a lot of free time on your heads when your team is in the basement.

B’s have a chance to bounce back Thursday against the Devils. Not much else to say.

After the jump…… poop, poop, poop and more poop…..

Positives
- Nathan Horton has really turned his season around lately. In eight games so far in January he’s got seven goals and nine points and is putting the fear back into opposing players and goaltenders. The guy is on fire. Hopefully he keeps it up.


He even looked better than Jack Edwards’ new boyfriend Stamkos. Kick his ass Horton.


- PAILLE SCORED ON A BREAKAWAY! AGAIN! HE’S A SHORTHANDED BEAST!



- Thomas had an off night but when Stamkos, St. Louis and Lecavalier stormed in on a three on one Thomas had the answer:



Negatives
- Look, we know last night was not Timmy’s best game. His last couple of starts have been human. We’re not denying that. But any Boston fans who ran to Twitter and Facebook talking about how much Thomas sucks and should be traded…. go fuck yourself.

How short are your memories? There is no Cup without Thomas. A player isn’t allowed to slump a little without people wanting to put him on the Trade Block? “Waaah Thomas is old! He’s past his prime! HE BLEW IT!” Go to Buffalo or Vancouver if you want to cry. Okay. We’ll tell you what. Trade Thomas. Then Rask goes down with an injury. What happens next you morons? Sure Rask has been lights out lately, but are you going to want to trade him too when he has a couple of bad starts? Are you really going to become like Red Sox fans and get spoiled by success? Lame.


- No. Bad boy.


- Jack Edwards. We usually love this guy but he couldn’t seem to get the Lightning’s balls out of his mouth. It was like listening to a Tampa Bay broadcast the way he was kissing their ass. We get it jack. Stamkos and St. Louis are talented. How’s about you start commenting on the game?

- Vincent Lecavalier. Maybe he should get traded to Vancouver like the rumors stay because his constant crying and pouting when someone hits him back would make him a perfect fit up there. So would the sucker punches.

- This recap.

LingeringQuestions
- Where have all the bandwagoners gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooone?


About Jon

Jon loves Batman, The Joker, the Bruins and hates you. Especially you. He has a man crush on David Backes and hopes to someday be Mrs. Jon Boychuk.

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