Teams fail offense? That unpossible! BRUINS LOSE.

Another thriller at TD Garden. No one on the Days of Y’Orr staff has clean pants and it has only been two games. The DOY office reeks of piss and whiskey. Terrible.

These two teams have played two games. In those two games they have played roughly 8 periods of hockey. They have scored a combined 4 goals. FOUR?!?!

The hockey nerds in us love the goalie duels and defensive battles. The Bruins fan in us wonders why the Bruins offense will wake up and solve Holtby. This is a prime example of how much the Bruins miss Horton now that goals are harder to come by in the playoffs.

Tough loss to take. But whatever. Series is tied 1-1. There is enough solid leadership in the Bruins locker room to keep them from letting this loss get to them. They’ll be fine. They’ll storm into Washington and Block the Red.

After the jump….. goals galore… except not really….. just the opposite…..

- Thomas’s playoff shutout streak finally came to end unfortunately. But going back to Game Seven last year, Thomas did not let up a goal in the playoffs for over seven consecutive periods. Tim Thomas is the man.

- We’re trying to get a new chant going because we’re super mature. Whenever Lucic scores the crowd yells “LUUUUUUUUUUU.” When Rask makes a big save the crowd yells “TUUUUUUUUUUUU.” From now on when Pouliot scores we all want you to yell “POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.” Trust us, it will be funny.


- Seidenberg has done a fantastic job shutting down Ovechkin. Seidenberg is in his head. Ovechkin is obviously frustrated. Every time he entered the offensive zone when Seidenberg was on the ice the puck was quickly stripped from Oveckin’s over rated ass. Seidenberg owns you bitch.

- Boychuk DESTROYING the Capitals little bitch of a bongo player.

- Bergeron was fired up. Dude kept trying to get people to fight him but no one would. He was obviously sick of all the Capitals cheap shots and tried to do something about it. Especially all the elbows being toss at him. Obviously the Capitals have heard rumors of Bergeron’s vicious left hand and wanted no part of it.

- Caps fans and that idiotic Habs writer and ex-WWF referee Dave Stubbs are all up in arms because Thomas punched Backstrom in his stupid whiny face, completely ignoring the fact that the wuss had been taking cheap shots all game. Apparently Thomas and the Bruins were trying to give Backstrom another concussion to take him out. Right. So when Backstrom was repeatedly slashing Thomas’ hand when he had the puck covered, Thomas thought to himself “I should concuss this guy again right now!” Right?

WRONG! Thomas was probably thinking “Hey, I don’t like this guy slashing me in the hand so I’m going to punch his stupid face off!” This isn’t the first time Thomas has done something like this and it won’t be the last. But hey, you idiot Caps fans and hacks like Dave Stubbs can keep trying to make up stories. How many Cups do the Caps have in their history? And what are the Canadiens doing right now?

- Speaking of head shots… Caps fans and Dave Stubbs… what do you have to say about Ovechkin nailing Seidenberg in the face, on purpose, with this stick?

Not even a penalty on that play. Double standard, eh? Oh, and then there were all the elbows John Carlson threw at Bergeron’s head. Apparently Carlson thinks he’s Randy Savage. By Dave Stubb’s and Caps fan logic, Carlson was trying to give Bergeron another concussion to take him out. MORONS.

- Everyone complains about Crosby whining. Why the hell does no one talk about Ovechkin whining. He runs around the ice throwing cheap shots behind the play, then cries to the refs every time someone even breaths on him. Worst Captain in the NHL. He’s a joke.

- The Bruins power play. Gross. They are never going to win the Cup if their power play continues to be this bad. Oh wait…..

- The Capitals are almost as bad as the Canucks. They start shit, hide behind the refs and then act tough. Idiots.

- Ovechkin = worst captain in the NHL.

- How long until Thornton makes this dirty, dirty Caps pay?

- How long until Holtby’s bubble bursts?

- When will Caps fans admit they didn’t give a shit about hockey until the Ovechkin draft?

- There used to be an argument in the NHL. Who is the best player in the NHL? Crosby, Ovechkin, Malkin, Stamkos and Shawn Thornton are all in that conversation apparently. When will people realized Ovechkin doesn’t belong to be in this conversation? 

About Jon

Jon loves Batman, The Joker, the Bruins and hates you. Especially you. He has a man crush on David Backes and hopes to someday be Mrs. Jon Boychuk.