When opponents suck, the Bruins suck. BRUINS LOSE. BAD.

What an awful, awful game. The Bruins looked like they got together and said “Hey Buffalo, here’s a win. We gift wrapped it for you!”

They barely challenged the very mediocre Ryan Miller. They looked like it was their first hockey game ever. The Bruins seem to have a team philosphy this season: Play a terrible team, Play terrible. They rarely generated any offensive chances and just seemed to give up. Horrible, horrible display. It was like the Bruins were the Bills and pretended they were playing against the Cowboys. Jon’s fiancee came into the living room during the third period, looked at the 5-0 score at the time and jokingly said “Do you want to watch Friends instead!?” Jon actually considered it for a second because even that would’ve been less painful than watching this game.

This game doesn’t even deserve a good intro.

After the jump….. suck, suck, suck, suck and more suck. Oh and the Bruins sucked too…..

– Shawn Thornton. The heart and soul of the Bruins. At least he showed some passion. Every skater except Thornton should be terribly, terribly ashamed of himself.

First McCormick stepped up and tried to tangle with the Mighty Thornton.

And with that… we celebrate!

Happy 100th to the third greatest player in NHL history! SHAWN THORNTON RULES!

Then that douche Weber thought it would be cool to take a cheap shot at Pouliot as he was heading to the bench. Thornton flew into action like a god damn super hero and punched that coward’s face into oblivion.

– Jordan Leopold. That is all.

– Milan Lucic kicking the shit out of that waste of human life Kaleta. Kaleta is the reason we are Pro Choice. Just kidding Timmy! Or are we? Who knows.

Too bad that idiot Pierre McGuire was too busy doing another stupid interview during the fight.

– We also like Lucic’s murder face.

– Chara showing Kaleta what’s up. Kaleta ran Chara and put up an elbow. If Chara wasn’t so tall it likely would’ve been a head shot. But then Chara got some payback and it was glorious.

– That awful, terrible, putrid interference call on Lucic’s goal. And that was a goal. Absolutely ridiculous call that likely changed the complexion of the game. Apparently Ryan Miller is a precious little flower that can’t be touched. 

– All the ass kissing the NBC staff gave Kaleta. Patrick Kaleta is a piece of shit and a terrible hockey player. He is a cheap shot artist who would rather run away than pay for his actions. If Lucic hadn’t grabbed him he probably would’ve skated away after chirping. Nothing brings us more joy than seeing Kaleta get absolutely abused.

Look at the end of the game. Kaleta completely turtled against McQuaid until other Sabres jumped in then he skated away as fast as he could and chirped from a safe distance behind the refs. Kaleta should go play for Vancouver because he’s a world class coward. Notice how Kaleta tried to go after Ference but then turtled when McQuaid came over.

– Sabres arena staff playing Sweet Caroline. Was that supposed to be an insult? The Red Sox play that shitty song, not the Bruins. Nice try though.

– Pierre McGuire: “Ryan Miller makes the big stops and doesn’t give up rebounds!”

– Wow does he suck.

– The Sabres pretending they are tough. We already covered Kaleta. Leino and his overpaid, talentless ass snowed Thomas then ran away from Seidenberg. Pominville chirped Thornton after he abused Weber, but Thornton was already being held back by the refs. Sabres fans think their team is tough. Just wait until their next meeting.

– When the hell will the Bruins start being the Bruins again?

– When the hell will the Bruins remember how to play team defense?

– Why are Buffalo fans chirping us after one win when they’re still living in the NHL basement and consoling their neighbor Rick Nash while he cries?

About Trashboy Jon

Jon loves Batman, The Joker, the Bruins and hates you. Especially you. He has a man crush on David Backes and hopes to someday be Mrs. Jon Boychuk.