RECAP: Chokely Carmichael. BRUINS LOSE.

 

As soon as the game was over the excuses poured in. Yes, we're sure the Bruins were tired after playing 65+ minutes the previous night. Yes, we're sure the Penguins relentless attack didn't help the Bruins energy reserves. But seriously. They scored their two goals and then just sat back and watched. You CAN'T do that against the Penguins. You just can't. They're too good.

Give credit to the Penguins. The B's kept them bottled up most of the game but they kept fighting. They never sat back. They kept pushing and pushing until the Bruins went home crying to mommy. Kunitz drew blood and the Penguins turned into sharks. Apparently the Bruins couldn't afford a bigger boat.

We're not buying fatigue as an excuse to completely abandon the game plan that was holding the Penguins at bay.

We hope Claude Julien flogs everyone. 


We felt the same at the end of the game.

Also, how awesome would a Bruins-Penguins playoff series be? To quote Joe Haggerty on Twitter: "Couldn't help but feel I was watching a preview of the Eastern Conference Finals."

Also, if you missed our awesome guest Jen (@JennyJenny987) on the pregame show, she predicted the Penguins would win 3-2. Yup. That happened. We blame her. Bad Jen. BAD!

Blah. Rematch Sunday. Should be AWESOME.

 

– Shawn Thornton and his beautiful offensive skills. That toe drag in the second period was just wonderful. Don't even care that he didn't score.

Shawn Thornton Boston Bruins

– While Fleury was busy starring at Patrice Bergeron's perfectly sculpted ass in front of the net Chara was busy playing with rockets.

Patrice Bergeron Zdeno Chara Power Play

– Next time you're trying to set the mood with your lady and/or man, forget about tossing on your Luther Vandross mix tape. Just play this Seguin goal on repeat. It was so good we wanted to have sex with it.

Tyler Seguin Boston Bruins

– We LOVE you Patrice Bergeron. You're AWESOME! He abused Crosby in the faceoff circle.

Patrice Bergeron Boston Bruins Archer

– Kris Letang… former TV star?!?!

Kris Letang Uncle Jesse

– Peverley schooling bitches on faceoffs. Wonder if that switch to center was hard?

– Boychuk has been incredibly solid the last few games. BEAST. That almost clear on the Pens 5-3 was kind of ridiculous. Blocking shots and putting on defensive clinics. Keep it up DESTROYCHUK!

Johnny Boychuk Boston Bruins

– The NBC announcers talking about Seidenberg's greatness.

– Khudobin overall. You can't fault him for his team completely falling apart in the third.

– Chara keeping Sid "No Longer Even Close to a Kid" Crosby in check.

Zdeno Chara Sidney Crosby

 

– Anyone who didn't get the reference to the post title.

– People who think Crosby sucks. You can call him a whiner or a diver or anything else you want to try to pretend he's not the greatest player on the planet but you're dumb. If you can say you wouldn't want Crosby on your favorite team you're either a terrible liar or your parents beat you relentlessy in the head with a hammer when you were young.

– Pascal Dupuis kept out muscling Milan Lucic. Yup.

– Khudobin constantly leaving the net inthe first period for NO REASON AT ALL. He was all like "here's a good idea, I'll just give the Penguins an open net!" So lucky Pittsburgh didn't score in the first.

Where he was supposed to be:

Where he was:

– Tanner Glass is a pedophile. Trying to undress a baby. 

– Chris Kunitz, shutout buster. What a shot. Jebus.

– Bruins in the third. Yuck. We're sure they were tired from the previous night but just damn. 

– Remember how Greg always says team speed kills the Bruins defense? Yeah, they didn't get the memo.

– Ference and Crosby didn't fight again.

– Why the HELL do the Bruins keep using the strategy of backing off on offense when they get a lead? You are aware the other team can, you know, score too right?

– Bruins in the third.

– Really, what the hell Bruins. Again, yes, we understand they were tired. But how the HELL do you take your foot off the gas that much against the highest scoring team in the league.

– Did anyone notice that Pizz downed an entire bottle of wine during the DOY pregame show?

– Is Kris Letang pooping in this photo?

– How much did Tyler Kennedy's parents beat him with the ugly stick?

– Do you think Chris Kunitz and Kris Letang ever argue over who is spelling their name wrong?

– When will the Bruins officially admit that the Marchand, Bergeron, Seguin line is the team's real first line?

About Jon

Jon loves Batman, The Joker, the Bruins and hates you. Especially you. He has a man crush on David Backes and hopes to someday be Mrs. Jon Boychuk.

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