F**k Baseball, It’s Hockey Season. BRUINS WIN!

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm hockey is back. The Bruins are back (pre-season doesn't count, those games are meaningless and barely anyone actually tries). 

Seems like the Bruins lines are still a little out of synch for the most part, but it's only the first game of a long season. The penalty kill was still amazing. Two shorthanded goals for the B's. 

No point really focusing on the negatives though after one game. There was just as much good. We're just so excited that the Bruins are back!

And that they showed their new division pals who really rules around here.

- Our pal Sean Tuohey had an awesome idea. Because Dougie Hamilton makes us think about the awesome cartoon Doug, we think whenever he steals the puck he should yell JACK BANDIT!

Thought Dougie looked really confident out there too. Hopefully he keeps building on that.

- So everyone who had Chris Kelly scoring the first goal of the season for the B's stand up. Shut up. Sit back down you liar. Kelly gets a penalty shot, channels his inner Shawn Thornton and then completely embarasses Lindback. Usually you have to buy your date a few drinks before the clothes come flying off but Kelly skipped all that and deked Lindback so bad he was naked.

- What a pass by Krejci and what a snipe by Lucic on the B's second goal. Absolutely beautiful.

- Bergeron you beautiful bastard. Bergeron doesn't have time for your short handed business. He only has time to be a MACHINE!

- Love what Iginla does already. He does this crazy thing called "shooting" on the powerplay. The Bruins looked so confused. They thought you were only allowed to pass around the perimeter with the man advantage. Then Iginla completely made the Lightning's version of John Scott his bitch.

- Damn was Rask solid. He saw a lot of action and the only goal he let in he pretty much had no chance on. It was a fantastic play by Grampa Bay and his defense kind of hung him out to dry. Rask really kept the B's in the game early on. 

- Shawn Thornton is such a gentleman when he fights. He even let's his opponent get ready and tells them if they still have equipment on that will prohibit them for giving their best.

- The Seidenberg deal. Saw a bunch of people complaining about the money and term and no trade clause. Look, Seidenberg is incredibly consistent. And he's fantastic. He's reliable. He's so incredibly under rated. People keep trying to point to the Finals saying he's not worth it. Oh no, an injured defenseman didn't do so hot against the best team in the NHL. SHIP HIM TO SIBERIA. Screw you. Seidenberg is awesome and we're excited he's going to be around for another four years.

- Caron played like a kid who's on his last chance. Oh wait, he is. Great game tonight, but consistency has always been his problem. If he keeps playing like he did against the Lightning he's got nothing to worry about though. We'll see.- 

- The first 16 minutes of the second period.

- Whoever is in charge of the music selectoin at TD Garden. Apparently this person thought there was a music apocalypse in 1999 and no music was ever produced afterward. So awful. Same songs year after year and they're so shitty. Someone fire this person and send them to Buffalo as punishment.

- People who cheer louder when Shipping Up to Boston is played than they do when the Bruins score. Please stop coming to games. Give your tickets to actual fans you complete and utter dumb asses.

- Bruins powerless play. Yuck. Not a great start.

- We haven't been able to see a replay on TV yet since we were at the guy, but it looked like Lindback never even touched the puck on that Caron goal that was waved off. Worst call since anything Buffalo has done. We're sure they've done something stupid today.

- Speaking of stupid things like signing Ville Leino long term, he's injured again. BuffaLOL.

- If you can say you don't poop your pants a lil whenever Stamkos or St. Louis has the puck, you're a dirty, filthy  liar pants. You liar. 

- Ryan Malone is the definition of awful. He is the load his dad wishes he sprayed in a tube sock.

- Little bit of a chemistry problem with the Bruins lines, but like we said it's just one game. Not point really picking it apart yet.

- How can you not love Iginla?

- Has Twitter picked a 2013-14 whipping boy yet?

- GO BRUINS!

About Jon

Jon loves Batman, The Joker, the Bruins and hates you. Especially you. He has a man crush on David Backes and hopes to someday be Mrs. Jon Boychuk.

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