RECAP: THE GOGGLES! THEY DO NOTHING! Bruins LOSE.

 

Awful. Just awful. We didn't expect the Bruins to go undefeated obviously but damn that was awful. If the Maple Leafs scouts only saw that game, not even they would trade for any of the Bruins defense. That game was the worst thing I've watched since Pearl Harbor. By comparison, Pearl Harbor is one of the greatest films of our time. I am too mad at the Bruins defense to even do a decent intro. Bruins completely deserved to lose that game. 

 

– Shawn "Wayne" Thornton. Buffalo fans can still pretend John Scott is awesome, but no one, NO ONE on the Sabres is even as close to as brave as Shawn Thornton. Going into the game Thornton knew he was going to have to fight Scott. He knew Scott wasn't brave enough to go after anyone his own size.

John Scott is 6'8", 258 pounds. Shawn Thornton is 6'2", 217 pounds. Still, Thornton knew what had to be down and went right after Scott the first chance he got. Sabres fans can celebrate the result all they want, but not a single player on the Sabres would go after Zdeno Chara. Not even "big, bad" John "Traffic Cone" Scott. You proved nothing Buffalo. You're still cowards.

– Brad Marchand UNDRESSING the entire Sabres defense and Ryan "Emo" Miller. What a fucking goal. And basically being a Sabre killer. THEN HE DID IT AGAIN!!!

– Rich Peeeeeeeeeeverley!!!

– The Bergeron, Seguin, Marchand line. Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeebus!!!

– Seguin had an amazing game. Still no goals with a goalie in the net but he was on fire for most of the game.

– "Krejci just takes Miller and BEATS him down!"

– Almost everything. Almost.

– Poor Tuukka Rask.

– How does Rich Peverley get punched in the face and is the only one that gets a penalty? Peverley would've messed you up Hecht.

– Vanek is a Bruins killer. Absolute killer. Especially when he's left uncovered.

– Where was the Bruins defense tonight?

Oh.

– Bruins defense. What were they doing? Was there some hot chick in the first row? A monkey juggling flaming chainsaws? Dolphin races? I don't care how awesome whatever it was. WATCH THE FUCKING OPPOSING PLAYERS AND THE PUCK. Hey Peverley, what do you think about this?

– That feeling in our stomachs when we thought Bergeron might be seriously injured.

– Thornton hurt. :( :( :(

– Stafford elbowing Dougie. But the Bruins are the only dirty ones, right Sabres? And John Scott threw an elbow at Peverley. Sabres fans celebreated. If Lucic or Marchand had down it they'd be burning down Twitter.

– Rough night for Destroychuk. Jebus man, what were you doing?

– Ryan Miller still blows.

– Why did we even bother with a recap?

– It's been a few years. When will the Bruins FINALLY overhaul their shitty power play?

– What time is the Sabres parade tomorrow?

Bruins probably needed that. A loss like that sticks with you. Besides, Bruins still can't hear the Sabres all the way up here in the standings.

About Jon

Jon loves Batman, The Joker, the Bruins and hates you. Especially you. He has a man crush on David Backes and hopes to someday be Mrs. Jon Boychuk.

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