53. Montreal Canadiens at Boston Bruins. BY GAWD! BY GAWD! THAT’S MILAN LUCIC’S MUSIC!

The Montreal Canadiens and their putrid excuse for a fanbase can lick my taint after a hard day at the gym. Actually, they're not even worth that much. They can lick a period on a heavy flow day. They're turds that need to be flushed in a toilet of acid. 

I love everything that's happening in Montreal right now. For some reason they don't hire Guy Boucher when he's available and allowed Michele Therrian to fuck everything up. Due to this, Montreal is barely knocking on the door for the playoffs. In fact, one could argue that if the Metro Division was any good outside of the Pittsburgh Sidneys, Montreal would be slurping their gravy soaked french fries wondering "Comment pourrait Therrian nous faire ça?!"

Instead they'll point out that they're a playoff team again and say to us "SEE! SEE! We're just as good as you! We're in the playoffs!" and then thoroughly get their ass kicked by whoever they play in round one (which would be Boston). 

But please Montreal, continue to tell me that Carey Price is a legit number one goaltender. Some clown this year already tried to tell me he should win the Vezina because his team is shit. Please continue to use the phrase "But no one has more Stanley Cups than us!" and then remind me that the last time you won a Stanley Cup was 20+ years ago. It's cool man, I get it. 

You can shove Ken Dryden and Patrick Roy and whoever you want in my face because it doesn't bother me. 

How's this for some face shoving? Carey Price is currently 30th in the NHL in GAA at 2.44. One can make a case that the ultimate goalie stat is save percentage, well Price is 21st with a .944 SV%. So you have a goaltender who is making $6.5M a year, playing on a team that has virtually no cap space this season and will pay out the ass for PK Subban next season. 

It's delicious. It really is. 

God I hate this franchise. 


Media

Puck Drop: 7:30pm EST
TV: NESN
Radio: 98.5 The Sports Hub
STREAMS: HERE


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