80. Boston Bruins at Winnipeg Jets. Still -100C in Winnipeg.

Winnipeg should be considered a natural disaster. The whole place sucks. Seriously. The hockey team sucks. The weather sucks. The people suck. The activities suck. The view sucks. There is not one redeeming quality about Winnipeg. No one wants to go there. No one wants to play there. Their management is stupid enough to give Ondrej Pavalec a 5 year, $19.5 million dollar deal.

Yeah, Ondrej Pavalec.

The same Ondrej Pavalec that wasn’t good enough to start for Russia in the Olympics. The same Ondrej Pavalec who has a GAA over three and a SV% barely over .900 (.901).

I can only imagine what current Jets GM Kevin Cheveldayoff does when he look at the Pavalec contract:

Woof. Add to that the enormous Evander Kane contract and the fact he’s been a complete disaster between big off-ice issues, stupid distractions like the whole “money phone” shit and his massive rash of injuries this year. Then you have the fans, the insufferable people who jerked each other off on a tar-mac because the Jets were back, refused to believe that they were birds of a different color and then would incessantly bitch/nag/moan and boast that this team would be a playoff team in “a couple of years”.

Where are they now?

Getting teabagged by the rest of the Western Conference.

teabagmq6So please excuse me as I refuse to believe that the Winnipeg Jets are a real hockey team. Fucking Atlanta North, that’s all this team really is. They’re a bottom dwelling basement team that would be stupid enough to trade their best player this offseason (sup, Buff?) because the #shittynarratives tell you that he’s fat, lazy, out of shape and sucks.

Seriously Winnipeg, the people of Winnipeg and anyone involved with Winnipeg – suck a big ole bag of rotten deer dicks.

Wild Card Watch


It’s official, the Blue Jackets and Red Wings have clinched playoff berths so we no longer have to watch Toronto and Washington. Fuck both of those teams. They can join Winnipeg in a game of ookie cookie, but instead of the loser eating the cookie a hurricane just blows the house away in oblivion. Now it’s all about the position.


There’s a ton of scenarios where Boston plays a different opponent. Obviously if the playoffs started today, Boston would be playing Detroit. Gag me with a spoon.

Fucking right Methanie Tanner. No one wants to face Detroit. Fucking nobody.

It’s entirely possible that Boston faces either Detroit, Columbus or Philadelphia with New York being a long shot – but still a possibility. Philadelphia plays Tampa tonight in Tampa.

Worst Bruin in the Past Decade Winner

It was close man, but Tomas Kaberle took the crown. All hail the king.


Potential Lines

Who the fuck knows anymore? 


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Know The Enemy

Gameday Image/Video

RIP Ultimate Warrior



About Pez

People seem to like me because I am polite and I am rarely late. I like to eat ice cream and I really enjoy a nice pair of slacks. Years later, a doctor will tell me that I have an I.Q. of 48 and am what some people call mentally retarded.