ECQFGM4Final

Adult Diapers Required. BRUINS WIN (IN OT)!!!

A common joke about the Bruins is that if a team really wants to beat them, all the other team has to do is start their back-up. The Bruins seem to score just fine on starters, but throw a back-up in and the Bruins make them look like… well, Greg says it best:

https://twitter.com/PezDOY/status/459484408786194432

Quite simply the Bruins were out hustled, out skated and just all around out played by the Red Wings in the first period as the Bruins did exactly what Greg predicted. Detroit found new energy with Zetterberg’s return while the Bruins looked like they just got done watching a Julia Roberts movie marathon and didn’t want to live anymore.

But if you have to pick just one word to describe this Bruins team, it has to be resilient. They found a way to get it done and are now one win away from the second round. A hot goalie can carry an average team far in the playoffs. A hot and elite goalie like Rask on a team like the Bruins… well, I just put a hole through my desk thinking about.

Fantastic game though. This series has been great. Thank you Bruins for battling and making it worth it for all the poop in our pants because of OT.

-And on the seventh day, Rask said “I am god.” Bruins would’ve been down 106-0 after their slow start if it wasn’t for Rask. Rask has literally been unbelievable so far in the playoffs. We knew he was elite but even this is a completely new level.

- Rask is just ridiculously good. The Bruins were missing chances like Toronto misses the playoffs and Rask just kept making brilliant saves to bail out his team.

- NBC bringing in someone who actually knows about hockey. What’s up Ference! Miss you. But seriously, what’s going on with that suit buddy?

- The beards in this series:

- How ridiculously awesome has Boychuk been in the playoffs?

- And Hamilton. He’s grown a lot already this series. He is overflowing with confidence. Love his play so far in this series. A lot.

- Oh Bergeron. Key faceoff win when your team needed it most leads to a Torey Krug goal on one hell of a blast. Finally gave the Bruins some life!

- When I see this I picture tassels on his nipples.

- Thornton having a little chat with Adbelkader. Hilarious. Could see the pool of piss under Abdelkader.

- FANTASTIC start to the third with Carl Soderberg yet again showing how awesome he is. His speed and vision to get that puck to Lucic for the tying goal was nuts. And Lucic loves to go nuts. And Soderberg is fucking AWESOME.

- Great overall game by Lucic. Loochamania was all like NUT UP OR SHUT UP.

- Thornton embarrassing Kronwall by avoiding a hit was hilarious. Kronwall fall down go boom. Thornton was also a beast all game. Great back checking. And an evil genius smile.

- Thought lil Reilly had a great game. A few key steals and some great battling in the corners. Loved it.

- Huge game by Krug. He might be small in stature but in the playoffs they say his tiny little heart grows three sizes each game.

- Julien. Short shifts to keep the boys fresh. Must’ve said something in the locker room before the third period too because the Bruins settled down and re-gained their composure.

- Krejci and Iginla were invisible through the first two periods. Detroit just bottled them up. As the Bruins missed more and more chances in OT we started to get a terrible feeling that the Bruins were going to lose on some dumb goal. Then the B’s first line had an amazing shift and Iginla gave Detroit the tip and gave all of Boston an orgasm. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

- I think Lucic came on The Kaiser when he saw the puck go in the net:

- I hope Marchand sends a lot of steak, booze and high class hookers to Rask and Iginla. If the Bruins lost that HUGE miss in the third would’ve haunted Marchand.

- Kronwall’s wife had a baby today. It immediately jumped elbow first at the doctor. The doctor is day-to-day with an upper body injury.

- Rask was the only Bruin who knew the game started at 8. Only shot that got by him was quite the blast. And the Red Wings first goal since Game 1.

- MARCHAND HOW DID YOU MISS THAT?! UGH. HOW?! THAT WAS THE GAME WINNER!!! JUST TAP IT IN! GIVE IT A LITTLE TAPPY! TAP TAP TAPAROO!

- Marchand just looked bad all night. Maybe his knee is more injured than we know.

- Not surprised Abdelkader keeps thinking he’s tough and doing shit after the whistle. If I was that ugly I’d want to punch everyone too.

- Everything about Brendan Smith. He’s even a dick to his own brother.

- Apparently coaching skills diminish with age just like a player’s body according to that fucking idiot Pierre McGuire.

- Bruins have lacked discipline at critical moments. You’re down 0-2 in the second. Detroit is having their way with you, so what do you do? Cross checks and extra shit behind the net to put Detroit back on the powerplay? Oh yeah, great strategy guys. Really.

- Can’t really fault Rask for Detroit’s second goal. Can easily see why he lost track of the puck and then Bruins just let Datsyuk stroll in unmolested. Gross.

- No wonder Pierre’s voice is so hoarse. He had that Detroit dick pretty far down his throat. Crosby was jealous.

Pierre said Detroit dick had a poor taste though. GET IT?!

- Tough call for Campbell. He was already committed to the hit. Definitely wasn’t malicious.

- This is what I want to do every time Pierre McGuire talks.

- People complaining about Rask. Go watch a Pittsburgh-Columbus game and then come back and talk to us about terrible goaltending you fucking morons.

- Detroit players must be FANTASTIC at hand jobs because they hold opponents sticks all game long.

- Lucic hits a post in OT and I go punch a box of kittens.

- Who cares, the Bruins won in OT. Love it or shut up.

About Jon

Jon loves Batman, The Joker, the Bruins and hates you. Especially you. He has a man crush on David Backes and hopes to someday be Mrs. Jon Boychuk.

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