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Krejci 3:16 Says He Just Whipped Your Ass. BRUINS WIN!

Well that was something. Bruins played better. Not great, but better. Good step in the right direction. Having Krejci back is huge. Obviously. I mean just look what he did. His hands are so silky smooth that Victoria’s Secret has offered him a sponsorship deal. You know how everyone has that one really weird friend […]

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Where Do Goals Come From? by Patrice Purrgeron

One night, during a game, the Bruins bench looked to the sky and saw something curious on the brightly colored board… Most of the Bruins hadn’t seen a goal before, and understandably they had questions… Uncle Purrgeron was a bit hesitant, but decided it was finally time the Bruins offense found out about the birds […]

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A Days of Y’Orr Public Service Announcement

Over the past several days, we’ve received a lot of feedback regarding some of our opinions on our dear, dear Bruins. Apparently a lot of people are upset. Apparently we’ve offended a lot of people by things we’ve said or done. Apparently some of these people feel we should ease up on the Bruins or […]

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Rask is So Filthy He Gave Us Tuukka Rash. BRUINS WIN!

It’s that wonderful time of year. There’s a slight chill in the October air. The sound of skates scraping on ice fills your ear holes. The Edmonton Oilers begin their annual push for the first overall pick in the draft. The Buffalo Sabres begin their annual quest to do anything of any relevance but inevitably […]

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Robb is doing the Boston Marathon Jimmy Fund Walk!

Days of Y’Orr staff member and resident stud muffin Robb Pizzuto is doing the 2014 Boston Marathon Jimmy Fund Walk on September 21st and we’d like to help him out by getting some more donations. For those of you that don’t know, Robb’s fantastic wife Michele (Miguel) had cancer as a child and with the […]

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Purrgeron Exit Interview: Milan Lucic

(Before heading home for the summer after their embarrassing loss to the Canadiens, DOY GM Patrice Purrgeron conducted exit interviews with each member of the Bruins.)

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Purrgeron Exit Interview: Matt Bartkowski

(Before heading home for the summer after their embarrassing loss to the Canadiens, DOY GM Patrice Purrgeron conducted exit interviews with each member of the Bruins.)

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Series of Missed Opportunities. Pun Intended. BRUINS CRASH AND BURN.

I apologize if you came here expecting our usual humor to try bring a bit of a bright spot to this situation. I can’t do it. If I was an idiotic teenage girl I might even say I can’t even. There’s myriad excuses people are using as to why the Bruins lost. Yes, there were […]

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Matt Fraser: Overnight Hero. BRUINS WIN!

We could not possibly be more pumped that the Bruins win. Really. But this game highlighted our frustration with the Bruins. The Bruins have played like ass for 90% of this series and the Canadiens are still barely hanging with them. So, the quote The Rock, why in the BLUE HELL aren’t they playing up […]

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Adult Diapers Required. BRUINS WIN (IN OT)!!!

A common joke about the Bruins is that if a team really wants to beat them, all the other team has to do is start their back-up. The Bruins seem to score just fine on starters, but throw a back-up in and the Bruins make them look like… well, Greg says it best: Quite simply […]

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Datsyuk Makes Us Hate Wizards. BRUINS LOSE.

Oooooh my name is Pavel Datsyuk. I have magic hands and score fancy goals meeeeeeeh. Yeah Bruins. That’s what happens when you give Datsyuk space. Girls get off by just looking at his magic hands. If Datsyuk worked at a massage parlor and gave Happy Endings we’d go at least 80 times a week. Great […]

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78. PHILADELPHIA FLYERS AT BOSTON BRUINS: SOMETHING, SOMETHING, WINTER IS COMING!

78. PHILADELPHIA FLYERS AT BOSTON BRUINS: SOMETHING, SOMETHING, WINTER IS COMING! (today’s preview is brought to you by the letters Marshall Ottina) The sky is falling! Two losses in a row! Sound the alarms, blow up the lines, bench Rask, call up Svedberg. I legitimately had someone tell me the B’s were going to fall […]

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Hi, I’m Chad Johnson And This is My Shutout. BRUINS WIN!

Eleven wins in a row. First team in the league to clinch a playoff spot. Chad Johnson’s fifth win in a row personally. Bruins just completely in the zone. Boners and lady boners EVERYWHERE thinking about the Bruins these days. It was nice to see the Avs test the Bruins as much as they did. […]

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