#ShitBidet Scores a Goal. Wrong Team Though. Bruins Lose.

Editor’s note: Tonight’s recap was written by the always funny Bree Mellen. Check her out on Twitter. Honk honk! All aboard the strugglebus, friends because this game was pretty gross. I’ll be your driver for the evening as the kind folks here at DOY have allowed me to recap the steaming pile of ass that […]

Rask Rap Battle

Inside Job. Bruins Win!

Yo. The Broons are beating good teams and looking good doing it. You could point to the Max Talbot deal, and say stupid things like grit, hustle, and heart. Or, you could look at it objectively and see that over the past 10 games, in which the Bruins have gone 8-1-1, David Pastrnak and Ryan Spooner […]


Quickcap. Bruins 3, Senators 1

1:02 2nd Ryan Spooner (2-Power play) from Torey Krug, Dougie Hamilton   15:21 2nd Loui Eriksson (17) Unassisted   16:53 2nd Ryan Spooner (3) from Milan Lucic, David Pastrnak       8:30 3rd Matt Puempel (1st career NHL goal) from Patrick Wiercioch,  Jean-Gabriel Pageau     Two sexy goals in your hometown? Ryan Spooner, come on down!   […]


66. Boston Bruins at Ottawa Senators. Gonna Take A Ride Into The Playoff Zone

Jesus Christ. Actually, based on the comments from yesterday and this morning regarding Gregory Campbell I should use the correct term for Jesus Christ. Please let me start over. If you don’t want to click the link, here’s is a reenactment: Gregory Campbell! It seems like every Bruins game for the next month or so […]


Quickcap. Bruins 3, Flyera 2

7:07 1st Zdeno Chara (6-Power Play) from Dougie Hamilton, Patrice Bergeron 9:43 2nd Jakub “Marshall’s Fantasy MVP” Voracek (20-Power Play) from Mark Streit, Claude Giroux 14th round of the draft. That’s when I got Voracek. No, I won’t shut up about it, Justin. You shut up.   15:30 3rd Chris Vande Velde from Nick Schultz, Brayden Schenn […]


Bruins re-sign Torey Krug and Reilly Smith

Wasn’t expecting any re-signs until the off-season, yet here we are. The Boston Bruins have announced they have re-signed Torey Krug to a one-year extension and Reilly Smith to a two-year deal. Krug will get a cap hit of $3,400,000 next season and Smith will earn an annual cap hit of $3,425,000. At least we don’t have to […]


Quickcap. Flames 4 Bruins 3

7:46 1st Brad Marchand (19) from Patrice Bergeron, Dougie Hamilton   A Bruins team that was “in need of grit and leadership” got it in the form of a stupid fucking boarding penalty from Max Talbot. (Drink every time someone mentions Game 7 of the `09 Finals)   18:49 1st Sean Monahan (23-Power Play) from Jiri Hudler, […]


63. Calgary Flames at Boston Bruins. Best Alternate Jerseys In The Business.

Imagine it. You’re going to the game tonight and you see the Boston Bruins exit the locker room wearing their yellow Pooh Bear jerseys. You’re excited to see such a magnificent jersey flowing as players shoot on Tuukka Rask. The Pooh Bear himself just smiling away, letting you know that everything is going to be […]


ESPN, Rogers, TVA to broadcast 2016 World Cup of Hockey

The NHL is returning to ESPN… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PReim0Axt4 …kinda. NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman and NHLPA head President Don Fehr announced that ESPN won the rights to air the 2016 Word Cup of Hockey. Rogers and TVA have been awarded the rights for Canada. From the NHL: “We are confident that all three of these broadcasters will provide […]


Brett Connolly out 6 weeks with broken finger

This is really the definition of the 2014-2015 Bruins season. During practice today newly added Bruins Brett Connolly took a shot from Dennis Seidenberg off the hand. He left the ice and, well, the diagnosis is not good. Bruins added in a press release that it’s a “displaced fracture in his right index finger.” *sigh* […]


I Am Not Mad At You Max Talbot. I Swear.

You can go through my timeline when the Max Talbot trade occurred and you can more than likely pinpoint the precise moment when I lost my shit. It was somewhere around here: MAX TALBOT IS THE BIGGEST CHIARELLI DEAL OF ALL CHIARELLI DEALS — Abominable SnowPez (@PezDOY)

2011 NHL Entry Draft - Round One

Bruins Acquire Zack Phillips from Minnesota Wild Affiliate

While the Internet was either praising or freaking out of the Max Talbot trade, Chiarelli also traded Jared Knight for forward Zack Phillips. Phillips has played in 49 games for the Iowa Wild (American Hockey League) this season, recording seven goals and eight assists. The forward has appeared in 196 games at the AHL level […]