38: Bruins @ Sabres. Pull up. PULL UP.

Before we can take this shit year out behind the shed and Old Yeller it, there’s the tiny matter of the home-and-home with Buffalo. The Bruins’ are in a slightly-less-than-controlled tailspin of late, going 3-5-2 in their last 10. December started so promising for the team, who opened the month with 3 straight victories. Since then, […]


Psh. 13 Is An Unlucky Number Anyways. BRUINS LOSE!

Well.  That happened. I wasn’t ready for this game.  My stomach and liver are still recovering from the holidays, and some jerk blew dust in my eyes immediately after I heard about Carrie Fisher.  Obviously the Bruins were going through some similar issues, if not then they obviously did not show up to play early against […]


Preview 37: Boston Bruins at Columbus Blue Jackets. That Fucking Cannon.

What a real kick in the teeth when coming back from your mandated holiday break. Instead of coming back to a broken spoke like Colorado or the Islanders, the Bruins have to fly out to Columbus and take on a god damn wagon. The Blue Jackets are the hottest team in the NHL right now. […]


Deck The Garden. BRUINS LOSE.

Deck the Garden with the Bruins, Fa la la la la la la la! McQuaid’s out there, please don’t ruin, Fa la la la la la la la! Praise to Bobby, we have Bergy, Fa la la la la la la la! Shoot it often, score real early, Fa la la la la la la la! Holy shit, Marchand’s amazing, Fa […]


36. Bruins At Hurricanes. SO MUCH WRAPPING TO DO

Yeah, if you’re anything like me and celebrate any gift-giving holiday around this time of year, then you either still need to go shopping, do wrapping, or both.  If you’re nothing like me and have finished all of that shit… Ahem… anyways, the Bruins have a quick turnaround after a solid win last night and […]


A Happy Life Day To All. BRUINS WIN!

I was torn tonight.  On one hand, Bruins were on, Vatrano was playing, and Boston had the chance to either gain a little ground on Florida, or fall out of a playoff spot.  On the other hand, I just found the USB drive I have with a copy of the Star Wars Holiday Special, and […]


35: Bruins @ Panthers. Kill me pls.

Be forewarned, I’ve had that death sentence of a stomach bug lately, so this preview will be just like the last 48 hours of my life: don’t expect anything too solid out of me. When the Bruins last played the Panthers on December 5th, they were knocking on Ottawa’s back door for 2nd in the […]


Jimmy Hayes 2.0 Is My Homeboy. BRUINS LOSE

Just hit play on the video below because I feel it speaks to the Bruins loss to the Islanders in so many ways. Are we all sufficiently grumpy and irritated now? Okay, good. The Bruins lost 4-2 to the New York Islanders last night and to be honest I’m not surprised as this year the […]


34. Islanders at Bruins. Trust The Gorton’s Fisherman

Oh Islanders, what happened to you? After a rough stretch, you were heading in the right direction.  You drafted a stud in Little Johnny Tavares, had three playoff appearances in four years, made it to the 2nd round last year. Now? Woof. That is some unsavory company you’re keeping there Islanders.  Your mother and I […]


Welcome To The Madness. BRUINS WIN!

Welcome to Bizarro World, my friends. I advise you keep your arms inside the cart at all times as we journey through the weird little game the Bruins managed to win this afternoon versus the LA Kings. One thing you should know about this game before we proceed any further is that there was only […]


32: Ducks @ Bruins. Happy 4/20.

If you’re not watching the Bruins stoned off your tits tonight, democracy has failed. More than it already has, but whatever. Happy Legalization Day, Massachusetts! Today is also the Bruins’ first look at Anaheim, who, I know this is shocking, are quietly having another superb season. Maybe it’s their lack of post-season success, but the Ducks […]


I Still Love You David P. BRUINS LOSE.

Yeah. This recap is super late. My apologies but hey better late than never, right? I figure you can read this then pop right over and read Marshall’s preview for the game today if you haven’t already so really that extends your enjoyment and you’re so welcome. The Bruins somehow managed to score more than […]


31. Boston Bruins at Pittsburgh Penguins. Defend The Wall.

The wall being Tuukka Rask. The Bruins are going to have to be at their very best when it comes to playing defense tonight. The Pittsburgh Penguins are the hottest team in the NHL at this point in the season – no ifs, ands or buts about it. Check this out: That’s absurd. The Penguins […]


No Suspension For Torey Krug.

Torey Krug hit Andrew Shaw so hard that Krug is going to smell like boiled hot dogs for a week. The hit has raised the ire of Canadiens fans and some of hockeytwitter in general. There was no penalty on the play but Alexei Emelin felt the need to get involved. Despite all of that, […]