Archives

Bucyk Thornton

Seven is greater than four…Bruins LOSE!

Fifteen goals in the last ten games.   If I do the math properly – which is never a given with my questionable skills in the subject – that equates to 1.5 goals per game.  No team is going to come out on the winning side of the scoreboard very often with offensive output like […]

sanjoseice

PREVIEW: “Hello? Is It Me You’re Looking For?” – Goal Light To Bruins Offense

The Bruins offense was tired. The trek out West has taken more out of it than normally anticipated. The offense needed to rest, recharge and refocus on what was important. It looked at itself in the mirror, large purple bags hanging underneath its eyes. ‘What am I doing?’ constantly ran through its head like a never […]

stewart

Peter Chiarelli Please Pass On Chris Stewart

Last night Peter Chiarelli was in Buffalo and the rumor is that he was once again scouting Chris Stewart. There’s been rumors floated before that the Bruins were interested in Stewart and if there’s a fire sale in Buffalo as Tanksgiving continues then the Bruins would be in on him. Chris Stewart is, at best, […]

kingsbruins1222014

The Quick and the Dead Offense. BRUINS LOSE.

There ain’t no party like a West Coast party. Unless you ask the Bruins. Then West Coast parties are terrible. 0-2-0 on the road trip so far. Jon and Marshall’s man crush Jonathan Quick is being charged with grand larceny after completely robbing the Bruins and especially Torey Krug. B’s offense is a blackhole of […]

los angeles

26. Bruins at Kings. Break the jewels from the crown!

Quick, everyone in the volcano! Tough loss from an overall good effort. It is a shame the Bruins couldn’t come away with points from last night’s tilt. It would have meant a lot coming into tonight’s game where Boston is playing another Western Conference powerhouse in LA. LA isn’t having a real LA-type season yet they still find […]

ducksbruins12012014

Quack. Quack. Quack. Quack. BRUINS LOSE.

Mostly good game. Tough loss. Bruins were great for the first two periods and parts of the third. Two mistakes gave them a 2-1 deficit heading into the third. Then the Ducks locked almost everything down in the third. Seriously, are we still sure Simon Gagne scored? All the back and forth action in the second […]

anaheim

25. Boston Bruins at Anaheim Ducks. Get Your Caffeine I.V.s Ready!

In the words of Timon “It starts.” It was only a matter of time before the annual West Coast road trip starts and boy is it a doozy this year. The Bruins start in Anaheim tonight, then travel to Los Angeles to play the Kings. That alone is a torture chamber of sorts but throw […]

elf

Direct Me To The Nearest Post Office. Bruins Win!

I haven’t even had my leftovers yet and this game was putting me to sleep. Real talk, if David Pastrnak wasn’t on the ice, I paid about 10% attention. This game was a fucking snoozefest and my 5 month-old has a fever, so somebody needs to bring me some forever stamps, `cause I am mailing this […]

winnipegice

24. Winnipeg Jets at Boston Bruins. Tryptophan Groans.

So I while I was on Facebook, I saw an article by the greatest sports writer that ever lived that stated “Milan Lucic Hosts Bruins Thanksgiving Dinner” and all I could think of was this:   You can only hope that the Bruins aren’t in a tryptophan coma after feasting last night and are ready […]

Pastrnaken

Unleash the Krack-…the Pastrna…the Pastrnacken? Fuck it. Bruins LOSE.

What an eventful two days for the Bruins!  After Saturday’s putrid showing against Montreal, we’ve seen the following transpire (listed in no particular order): Brad Marchand removed from IR, Zdeno Chara moved to LTIR (even though reports are saying he could return in as early as ten days from now), the overachieving Seth Griffith sent […]

julienshrugging01

Habs-itual Beatings. BRUINS LOSE.

No Krejci. No Marchand. No Kelly. A healthy Milan Lucic. A defensive group made up of mostly AHL players. Second half of a back to back. What could go wrong? Almost everything. As you’d expect. The Canadiens are so far in the Bruins heads that the B’s can’t handle them when healthy. When half the […]

montreaicel

22. Montreal Canadiens at Boston Bruins. Ermagerd Scheduling Conspiracy!!!!

Now before I start my preview, I hope the headline brings in a lot of complaining Montreal Canadiens fans. You already know the usual bullshit you’re going to hear: “Dur, look at the stupid Bruins fans complaining about the schedule!” “Ugh the Ruins fans already using the wheel of excuses!” To all those wearing the […]

kokobware

Khoko B. Ware! Bruins Win!

Did the Bruins show up for the first 40 minutes tonight? Did they show up for the third?   An early opportunity was foiled when the laws of physics, angry at Patrice Bergeron for his lifelong defiance, partnered with Dalton Prout to keep Bergeron’s shot, which had trickled past Sergei Bobrovsky, from crossing the goal […]

columbus

21. Boston Bruins at Columbus Blue Jackets. All Aboard The LumBUS!

This preview is going to be short as shit because this is the first time I’ve been able to sit down all day thanks to work. Don’t like it? Too bad. “Pez you’re an asshole trashboy.” My retort:   The Bruins are going on a nice little one game roady out to Columbus! Before we […]

Quantcast